July 2026. Newcastle. Not even lunchtime as I leave the Free Trade for the walk through Ouseburn back into Toon. Actually, a rare walk along a dried up river (I never knew that watercourse was actually called the Ouseburn till today), my first look at this Newcastle cultural highlight since a Julia Jacklin gig at...

July 2026. Ouseburn. Newcastle. Back from Cramlington by mid morning, with 5 hours till the bargain advance fare return to Sheffield. Not quite enough time to head west to Haltwhistle, or south to Seaton Carew, for another tick. But plenty of time for some aimless exploration along the Tyne. I was only in Ouseburn...

July 2026. Cramlington. Northumberland. When you say “Northumberland” these days you think Harry Potter, posh Cambridgeshire families at the beach, and a small island covered in bird muck. But there’s an awful lot of old mining towns before you get there, I can tell you. I spent ages getting ChatGPT to work out the...

July 2026. Newcastle. Trips to Newcastle produce a wealth of blog material, even when the pace of new pubs dry up and you start to feel you’ve seen Grey Street just a few too many times. That picture from the top of one of the UK’s great streets outside the Theatre Royal is instructive. It’s a place that doesn’t get...

July 2026. Newcastle. Last week my son told me I had “mainstream music taste“. Let that sink in. “Matthew has to be contrary” says Mrs RM. “I suspect your son enjoys winding you up” says ChatGPT. And you can rely on ChatGPT, folks; it told me so. ChatGPT was helping me to find some mainstream music that Monday night...

July 2026. Monkseaston. Tyne & Wear. Whitley Bay ticked, Spanish City gelato licked, I headed for the metro back to the Toon. It’s a problematic map, every stop the gateway to a classic pub that distracts you from culture. I really should have popped back to the Tynemouth Lodge for Bass (patience !), but fell at the...

July 2026. Whitley Bay. Tyne and Wear ticked for another year, I thought I’d best visit the Bay bit of Whitley, as I seem to be the only person not heading to the coast this summer. Will the water be warm enough to swim in by September ? Oddly, more adults than children on the sand, apparently sifting through...

July 2026. Whitley Bay. A Monday night on the Toon gives an unencumbered man many options. Though not, sadly, the micro pub in Seaton Delavel, which would have been a nice tick on the Northumberland line if open. I drop my bag at the easyHotel, which has impressive tiling, but some technical issues. A lady asks me...

July 2026. Newcastle. Mrs RM’s sporting injury (pics only available to Patronised readers) precluding a return to the Cask Camino, I set off alone in search of blog material. You can get a return to Newcastle for £33 from Sheffield, and outside the heady stag/hen weekends the Toon has bargain central rooms, as you...

July 2026. Sheffield. I drove down with the boys to see Dad a week ago, and back the same day. Dad didn’t recognise us, but was enjoying the company and the fishcakes, which is what matters. Now Sunnyside is sold I’ve no need to stay in Waterbeach, and the boys have no fondness for Cambridge, though I can’t imagine...

July 2026. Sheffield. The boys wanted to visit Dad with me, so we all popped down Saturday after a night of fringe fun. Tramlines “proper” is Sheffield’s equivalent of Latitude (ugh), without the pashminas and laughing gas and dangerous proximity to Southwold. 3 days (no camping) of heritage (ugh) bands living off...

July 2026. Whitchurch. Shropshire. A short post to end Whitchurch on a high. A 4pm opener, 12 minutes walk to the station, train to Crewe at 16:44. Perfect. And the Crafty Dragon, which I am going to call the Magic Dragon, opened a minute early. I like that in a pub. Opening half an hour early and not telling folk...